


Thanksgiving

by MagicMage



Series: Joshua Shepard [5]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Thanksgiving
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-13
Updated: 2014-10-13
Packaged: 2018-02-21 00:24:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2448557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicMage/pseuds/MagicMage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Kaidan and Joshua's first official Thanksgiving, but Joshua has had issues with most every holiday he's come into contact thus far. Kaidan doesn't even know if the day is going to go well. Dinner is in the oven and Joshua isn't even there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thanksgiving

**Author's Note:**

> I tried to make this fluff, is this fluff? I don't know. I tried. 
> 
> Also I didn't read over this because it's 1:30 AM, but whatever.
> 
> Some random person on tumblr suggested it so...yup.
> 
> Happy Thanksgiving!

Kaidan wasn’t sure if today was going to work. Every single holiday they’d come into contact with thus far had had to be slowly introduced, from idea to completion, because his lover either hadn’t experienced them before or had experienced them badly.

Joshua’s first birthday after the Reaper War had been something awful. Just about the only holiday he did seem to enjoy was Christmas, and even then he’d got quite overwhelmed by all of the planning and the cooking and the organisation. It was probably due to his need for things to be perfect, be it for himself or the people around him, which made these holidays too hard to handle.

They hadn’t even _tried_ Valentine’s Day yet. Their first Valentine’s together had consisted of Joshua spending most of the day in bed with the blanket pulled over his head, and Kaidan hadn’t been able to bring himself to feel badly about it. On their second Valentine’s Joshua had still regarded the day with wide eyes and a panicked look at him before ignoring it and pointedly doing something else for the next several days.

Kaidan had found a box of very expensive chocolates, a rather large bottle of whiskey, a new cup for his morning coffee, expensive coffee to go with the cup, Alliance approved cuff links which must have also cost a fortune, and an entire shaving kit, plus a razor which he had later found out Samantha Traynor had suggested because of it’s tiny mass effect fields which supposedly prevented razor burn and accidental cuts, all stuffed up in the top cupboard above their fridge several weeks later when he’d been looking for something completely different.

When he’d asked Joshua what the heck all of the stuff was, Joshua had turned a rather adorable shade of pink, muttered something about lack of exercise, and run off to the fancy pool which their new apartment provided for the next four hours until Kaidan had gone down to get him.

At least they were out of the awful apartment, even if Joshua had gone a little bit crazy with the worth of their new one.

He’d somehow managed to coax Joshua out of their apartment, which was just off English Bay like he’d mentioned many years back, to go and get some actual supplies for Thanksgiving. Joshua had remained mostly silent for the trip, pushing their cart and looking around at the other people who were also starting to return to normal lives now that all the major cities and most rural places of the world had finally recovered.

Kaidan had kept a close eye on him because he still didn’t like being in public due to how much attention people gave him, but Vancouver had always been quite a bit quieter than New York and so while people noticed him they didn’t usually approach him for no reason.

That day had been quiet, they’d only been approached by five or six people, most of whom had cleared off with a handshake and a teary eyed, “thank you.”

It was just after 1PM on Thanksgiving and Joshua had gone off for a run, because he couldn’t stay still for more than ten minutes even though his hip still bothered him sometimes. Kaidan was in the kitchen, with his mother, putting together dinner. She was getting the turkey ready to put in the oven and Kaidan was mostly watching her. When he’d said he wanted to try and cook Thanksgiving dinner she’d agreed, but once she’d got into the kitchen she’d taken over like a well-oiled machine.

“Do you think he’s gone running to get away from me?” she asked, sounding mildly amused. The first time Joshua had met her she’d given him the, ‘you’d better take care of my boy’, speech and he’d spent the rest of the trip checking around corners and treating Kaidan like an egg he might drop and break.

Kaidan chuckled softly. “I wouldn’t doubt it, that or he’s running away from the turkey.”

His mother nodded her affirmation. “Turkey can be pretty scary.” She chuckled as well, turning to him with a lopsided smile on her face which was quite similar to his own. “I’m sure it’ll be fine,” she assured him. Somehow she’d seen through his own cheeriness to his worries underneath.

“Yeah, I know. I just don’t think he’s used to these family type occasions.”

“I know,” his mother told him. “I was here last Christmas.”

That time Kaidan snorted.

They set the turkey up in the oven and retired to the living room to talk. Kaidan made up two coffees and a tea for his mother, even though he wasn’t sure when Joshua would be returning…though he hoped it would be before dinner.

There was still so much to catch up on. His mother still lived in the Okanagan and so while they were much closer, they were also quite caught up in their lives. Kaidan had begun work as a Spectre again once the Citadel had started being rebuilt, to Joshua’s dismay, and he spent quite a bit of time flitting between assignments and home. As such most of his communications with his mother were via messages as opposed to real calls.

“Joshua doesn’t like it, does he?” his mother asked as she sipped her tea calmly across from him on the large sofa. He’d just finished talking about how his last mission had ended up, without revealing any classified information.

“No.” Kaidan sighed, shaking his head. The collection of models in their office, which had started out with his original collection of slightly beat up models, had more than quadrupled over the last year and a bit. Joshua was bored, and clearly feeling left out, and as much as he enjoyed returning home to loving embraces and Joshua having missed him _so_ much, he knew that Joshua hated the life he was living right now.

His mother leaned back against the couch, tapping her finger against her lip with one hand and balancing her cup on her knee with the other.

The door to the apartment chimed and slid open and Joshua came in, his hair wet and clinging to his forehead, and his shirt clinging to his chest. Kaidan looked up, glancing over him and noting he was a bit _too_ wet for having just taken a run.

He stood up, placing his cup on the coffee table and meeting his lover at the door. “Did you fall in a puddle?” he asked softly, smiling as Joshua looked at him and then quickly located his mother before looking back.

“No, I took a shower downstairs,” he said, leaning forward for a kiss so that Kaidan wouldn’t get wet. Kaidan couldn’t stop smiling, Joshua did really odd things when his mother was around. He returned the kiss gently.

“We have a shower in our house you know, you don’t have to use the one at the pool,” he told him, pulling back slightly and admiring the way Joshua’s shirt was currently clinging to his muscles. With the lack of entertainment Joshua had been working out quite a bit, he couldn’t complain about the results.

Joshua blushed, glanced over at his mother who was discretely watching-not-watching them and then looked back at him helplessly. He looked like a puppy who didn’t want to jump from a high place and wanted to be helped down.

“When’s dinner?” Joshua asked nervously, hands rubbing with equal nerves in front of him. Kaidan sighed, taking his hands and holding them still. Joshua wanted the day to be over already, he could see it in his eyes, his posture, and the way he kept glancing around nervously as if expecting husks to swoop down from the rafters.

“About three and a half hours, love,” he told him, leaning in for another soft kiss and hoping to reassure him. “Go get a change of clothes, I have coffee for you when you’re ready.”

Joshua pouted at him, and for a moment he wanted to be able to forget that his mother was sitting about ten feet away from them so that he could push Joshua up against the dividing wall between the entry way and the living room and kiss him until he felt better. But that wasn’t going to happen, and it was probably part of the reason that Joshua was so nervous. He didn’t seem to know what was and wasn’t okay in terms of displays of affection.

He raised an eyebrow at him instead, hand grazing over his shoulder and settling on his bicep for a moment so he could squeeze it gently, urging. Joshua nodded and stepped around him, down the hallway and up the stairs to their bedroom.

Kaidan turned back to his mother on the sofa, who was giving him an odd, interested smile. He sat down as she said, “Is he going to come back?”

“I don’t know,” he replied, looking up in the direction of their bedroom. “He may just stay up there for the next several days and hope I don’t notice.”

His mother chuckled, sipping at her tea delicately. “You know, when you first told me Commander Shepard…but he’s adorable isn’t he?”

They’d had this conversation a few times, his mother had started out unsure about their relationship for the sheer fact that Joshua was Commander Shepard and there was a lot more than fantastic fire fights and saving the galaxy to that relationship. It wasn’t all glory, there was a lot of blood, sweat, and tears. She’d warned him, but he’d shrugged it off. He was glad he had, he was also glad that his mother cared enough to worry about it.

“Yeah, he is,” Kaidan agreed, unable to tear his gaze away from where their bedroom was behind the wall.

“Oh, go get him, I’m sure he’s already panicking about what to wear.”

He turned back to his mother, who was smiling knowingly at him over her cup. She knew enough about him to know enough about Joshua, which caught him off guard sometimes.

He smiled back at her. “Yeah…thanks mom, I’ll be back in a minute.”

He got up off of the couch, groaning slightly as he did so. Vancouver was great, but the air was humid most of the time regardless of whether it was raining or not and sometimes it did a number on his old wounds. He wandered up the stairs, and down the short hallway to their room where he opened the door to find Joshua standing naked except for his briefs at the closet and just staring into it blankly. With his back to him Kaidan could see the tension in his shoulders, and the tail end of the scar which ran across his middle.

“Hey,” he called from the door, stepping in and letting it close behind him.

Joshua glanced over his shoulder at him, clearly not surprised to see him there, but also not offering any explanation for his inactivity. “Hey.”

Kaidan stepped up behind him, resting his chin on his shoulder and wrapping his arms around him. “What’s wrong?” he asked, feeling Joshua’s arms flex slightly under his. There was a moment of pause, but he was used to this after two years of (mostly) functioning relationship, so he just relished how _warm_ Joshua felt until he spoke.

“I want to wear my N7 hoodie,” Joshua told him. Kaidan waited, only nodding slightly to indicate he was listening. “Is that too informal? What am I supposed to wear? Do I wear a suit? I don’t even think I own one…I only have the old formal blues from the Alliance and…”

“It’s Thanksgiving, not a formal gathering. We’re _family_ ,” Kaidan replied gently. He realised the problem wasn’t necessarily with the clothing, or the shopping, or anything like that, it was that the ‘mission’ didn’t have set parameters. Joshua didn’t know what was expected of him so he was making up expectations he couldn’t meet and freaking himself out.

“Family…” He felt Joshua take a shaking breath, before he was turning around in his arms and looking at him with that same puppy-helpless look again.

Kaidan looked him in the eye, hoping to slow down his lover’s obviously whirring brain and keep his attention. “That means you get to relax, and sit back, and we’ll just _be_ for an evening. We just have slightly fancier food than usual and you’re supposed to come up with something you’re thankful for. You don’t have to worry about anything,” Kaidan explained, watching as Joshua pressed his lips nervously together and glanced down.

“I’m thankful for you,” Joshua muttered, in a very small voice. “But I already knew that.”

Kaidan smiled, reaching up to take hold of Joshua’s chin and urged it back up so that he could kiss him like he’d wanted to do in the entry way. With one arm freed Joshua reached up to hold the back of his shoulder, his other arm going around his waist.

“I’m thankful for you too,” he told his lover gently, holding him firmly with one arm around his middle while the other rested over his shoulder. “And I know you know that, but it’s just a day for thinking about it.”

They stood there for a while, Joshua looking at him, then looking over at the door, then glancing around the floor, while he watched him.

It was hard introducing a man to holidays and traditions when he had no idea what he’d experienced as a kid, how he wanted to experience them, or if the trauma he’d gone through had tarnished all of the memories. It was harder when everything that wasn’t set in stone, a mission, or a model which had very explicit instructions sent said man into a panic. All because he didn’t want to screw things up for _other people_.

After a while Joshua leaned forward, resting his head on his shoulder and nuzzling there like he was planning to stay. He squeezed him gently and Joshua squeezed back.

“I’m thankful for _everything_.”

“I know,” Kaidan replied, kissing the side of his lover’s head. “Do you know what you want to wear?”

“Your mom scares me.”

Kaidan had to laugh at that. “I know, but she really does like you.”

“I’ll wear the hoodie,” Joshua decided. They released each other simultaneously so that Joshua could turn back to the closet. Kaidan wandered over to the drawers and pulled out a pair of jeans which he knew Joshua liked and tossed them on to the bed for him.

He watched on while Joshua got dressed, seeing how he at least seemed a bit more relaxed now. When he was finished, wearing the jeans that Kaidan had picked out and his hoodie with a white t-shirt underneath, he looked up at him with an almost ‘what do you think?’ look.

Kaidan smiled, leaning back against the drawers with his arms crossed. “I’m thankful for those jeans.”

Joshua frowned at him, looking down at himself as if expecting there to be something wrong with them. “What?”

“Turn around.” He did. “Yep, I’m definitely thankful for those jeans.”

Joshua snorted, turning back around and mock scowling at him as he crossed the room and came to a stop in front of him. He took hold of his hips. “You’re not supposed to dress me up sexy when company is over.”

Kaidan shrugged. “I think it’s the perfect time, gives me a reason to watch you while you try to cook.”

The mocking scowl became a real one.

“I’m not going to try to cook.”

Kaidan chuckled and saw the way that Joshua’s lip twitched upwards slightly as he did so. “Are you ready to spend the next four hours talking to my mom?” he asked, reading his expression closely. He automatically looked concerned.

“I have nothing to talk about. I don’t care what anyone says, just having been Commander Shepard isn’t interesting. I don’t want to talk about it with anyone, and I have nothing interesting to say about anything,” Joshua complained.

“Why don’t you show her the models?” he offered. Joshua’s eyes lit up slightly. “Why don’t you show her the _fish tank_?”

Joshua gasped. “I _could_ show her the fish tank. I just got some new jellyfish.”

The fish tank would easily take up two hours on its own, once Joshua started talking about it he wouldn’t stop. He was sure his mother would be at least sort of interested in it, maybe. The fish tank had so many plants, colours, and fish in it. He was pretty sure that Joshua had spent more money on the fish tank than their apartment.

“I love you Joshua,” he muttered softly, watching as the expression on Joshua’s face softened and his eyes narrowed slightly in affection as he smiled.

“I love you too.”

“Ready to go back downstairs?” Kaidan asked, straightening up as Joshua pulled away from him on cue and started heading for the door.

“Yeah.”

Kaidan watched him for a few steps before following him. “I’m definitely thankful for those jeans,” he told him, stepping up beside him and hooking a hand into his back pocket.

Joshua turned to him, pausing shortly in the doorway to rest his head on his shoulder. “Say that one more time and I’ll take them off.”

“No,” Kaidan replied lowly. “I’ll do that, later.” He felt Joshua shiver slightly and knew he’d won. He squeezed his buttock gently before retracting his hand and stepping through the doors. “Happy Thanksgiving Joshua,” he said over his shoulder on the way down the stairs.

It took a moment for Joshua to reply, having successfully fried his brain as usual. “Happy Thanksgiving Kaidan,” he replied finally, following him down the stairs.

Kaidan smiled as he returned the living room with Joshua in toe, today was definitely going to work.


End file.
